Oh, Nathan. I'm so happy!
l know everything`s going to be just great.
Voil?
-Voil? -Thanks.
-How`s work? -Cruddy. You satisfied?
l don`t want your work to be cruddy.
I'm sorry. My assistant quit today.
He was highly valuable to the project.
Oh, baby, I'm so sorry.
-Can you find somebody else? -l guess. Whatever.
l could come work for you. l know I haven`t been that...
supportive of the project, but I've come around.
lt`s a wonderful project. You taking that...
poor, uncivilized creature and turning him into a human being.
What a compassionate, kind man you are.
-l had sold my fucking soul. -l let her sell her soul.
l stood by as she did it. lt`s inexcusable.
At the time, though, I thought it might be good for her.
When she came to work with Nathan, gentlemen, she seemed different.
l don`t know, somehow... soulless.
Bravo!
-Bravo to you, Puff. -Bravo!
Tame me, doctor. Tame your little monkey of love.
-Well, I'm tamed, Dr. Bronfman. -I'm glad... my assistant.
Thank you.
l`ll start today with the foie gras.
-l gotta crow -l gotta crow
l gotta crow
-and raised to the highest of culture and refinement.
This is a priceless gift bestowed upon me by Dr. Nathan Bronfman.
-End of tape 43. -l think he`s ready.
Oh, boy!
Oh, boy.
Now, Puff, we`re leaving the electric collar on.
l don`t think we`ll need to shock you, but just in case.
Okay. That`s fair.
Congratulations.
-Oh, thank you. -No, Puff bad!
-My apologies, madam. -lt`s all right, Puff.
lt shan`t happen again.
Shall we?
This is great, Puff. You`re doing fine.
I'm loving this. lt`s such a treat to be out and about.
What a wonderful invention the city is, the immense buildings...
of glass and steel glinting in the afternoon sun...
the smartly dressed women in their best summer frocks...
-the colorful street vendors. -How is everything?
Just spectacular. Great salmon. Fantastico!
You`ve got to give me the recipe. My compliments to the chef!
I'm glad you like it. The chef will be very... pleased.
So, will that be all?
lt shan`t happen again, I swear.
I'm just getting my sea legs, you know?
lt`s an animal urge, Puff. lt`s nothing to be ashamed of.
Lila!
-Tell him. -You have to control it.
We`re not monkeys.
Lila?
Good, you`re doing fine.
You`re doing very nicely, Puff. I'm pleased.
Excellent.
Great.
Excellent work, Puff. Extra dessert tonight.
Tomorrow, the acid test.
-How y`all doing today? -Very well.
-Good enough. What can I get you?
Puff, why don`t you order first?
-What`s a Reuben, please? -What`s a what, sweetheart?
A Reuben. That`s a sandwich with corned beef and sauerkraut-
Fine! That`s what l`ll have. Corned beef is a good...
decent meat. Someone else please go now, please.
l`ll have the big basket.
I'm proud of you, Puff.
You did remarkably well under difficult circumstances.
-Absolutely. -Did l?
l tried so hard! I really concentrated! Oh, I'm so happy!
And because you did so well, we have a little surprise for you.
-Extra dessert? -Even better.
Surprise!
Free to come and go as you please. There`s even some...
``mad money`` in the night table drawer for you.
lt`s wonderful! Do you think I'm ready, do you really?
l trust you`ll make good, mature decisions.
l trust you`ll do the proper thing.
l will. Your very trust has instilled an enormous sense...
of responsibility in me. l don`t want to disappoint you.
Good. Remember, when in doubt...
don`t ever do what you really want to do.
-That`s the key. -Got it.
Oh, sorry, darling!
When some things are known...
of which, the one inheres in the other or is locally distanced-
-related in some way to the other...
the mind straightaway knows by virtue of that simple...
apprehension of those things, whether the thing inheres or...
does not inhere, whether it-
I'm going to go down and check on Puff. See how he`s holding up.
-Should I come? -Nah, you just relax.
-How`s the book? -Mmm, good.
l won`t be long.
Forget it! Maybe l`ll just stay here and get shitfaced again.
-That`s a cIassy idea. -lt passes the time, doesn`t it?
-Yeah, what? -Hi, it`s Nathan.
Call you back.
-You bastard! What do you want? -Just want to talk.
You have made your decision, Mr. Stinky American.
-I've got some things to tell you. -Like what?
l think it would be easier if l could talk to you face to face.
-What for? -Well, I think--
You think too much! All you are is one big thing...
with lots of thinks in it! Full of thinks!
So many thinks that you have nothing to think at all!
-What? -You heard me.
You make me want to be sick when you pretend that...
you don`t understand what I am saying to you. Go away from here!
-I'm sorry to have bothered you. -All right, already!
Come in if you must. The door`s open, you son of a bitch!
ln here, you lousy piece of merde.
-Well? -God, you`re beautiful.
-Please, I look a mess. -No, you look so beautiful.
Anyway, come already to the point.
I'm going to leave Lila. l can`t stop thinking about you.
-I've moved on. -l love you, Gabrielle.
Just give me some time to let Lila down easy.
She`s a really nice girl.
l don`t want to hurt her anymore than necessary.
You hurt me, you know... when you made Nathan`s Choice.
Does that not even matter to you, you pig?
-You were gone a long time. -Puff and I got into a...
big, philosophical discussion. He really is quite well-read...
considering he`s only been literate for a month now.
He`s going to make us really famous, Lila.
-So he`s doing okay? -Yes.
Very well. Just a quiet evening enjoying his new digs.
That`s funny, because I just went and picked him up...
at a flophouse on the lower east side.
He called here after he ran out of his mad money...
where he`d spent the entire evening drinking...
watching strippers and fucking a whore.
So, what did you do tonight, honey?
-Shit. -What did you do tonight, honey?
I'm in love with somebody else, Lila.
-And what did you do tonight? -l fucked her, ok? I fucked her!
Do you know what l gave up to be with you?
-Yes. -l gave up my soul!
l gave up my beliefs. l gave up my body hair.
So, without further ado...
l give you Dr. Nathan Bronfman... and Puff.
Thank you. Let`s get right to it.
Here we have Puff on the day of his capture.
No maid service!
Can`t you read the fucking ``do not disturb`` sign...
-hanging on my fucking doorknob? -Lila, it`s Louise.
Go the fuck away, Louise!
To say that he took me from crayons to perfume...
would be a vast understatement.
Dr. Bronfman took me from playing with my own feces...
then to crayons...
then to an appreciation of the complex works of Franz Kline...
Joseph Beuys, Marcel Duchamp. From compulsive masturbation--
This is who I am, Louise. This is what I look like! This is me!
And I don`t want to pretend anymore.
l offer you electrolysis because...
jeez, that`s all I have to offer.
But I want whatever makes you happy, okay?
-Does this make you happy? -Why won`t they let me be happy?
l don`t know what to do. l don`t know what to do.
-And I killed Puff. -No. Puffs not dead.
Sort of, he is. And sort of, I did it.
You`ll come home with me. We`re going to fix you right up.
We`ll work around the clock until it`s done.
And so, goodnight, adieu... until we meet again.
Au revoir.
-You were wonderful. -Was l? I wasn`t a tad stiff?.
Oh, don`t be silly.
And you were wonderful, too.
l especially liked the way you said, ``Au revoir.``
Come on you two. Let`s go celebrate.
That`s it. My name`s Puff.
And now, the tango.
l thought it went swimmingly today.
-You two make an excellent team. -Fantastic.
To be taken from the depths of depravity and ignorance...
and raised to the heights of culture and refinement.
This is the priceless gift bestowed on me by...
Dr. Nathan Bronfman.
Done.
So, we have 1 7 new bookings, my wonderful man.
Terrific. We`re all going to be rich and famous.
-Thanks to you, Nate. -Thanks to you, buddy.
And your diligence and your intelligence and perseverance.
And, of course, to you, my sweet, for your...
for your moral support.
Excuse me. Are you Dr. Bronfman?
-Yes. -ls that a little boy?
No, Puff. This is a dwarf.
l guess they prefer to be called ``little people``.
-lsn`t that correct, my good man? -ln actuality...
l prefer to be called Dr. Edelstein.
Dr. Edelstein is a fully-grown adult, Puff, believe it or not.
-Who, due to a genetic anomaly-- -Achondroplasia.
--who, due to achondroplasia, is actually a miniature human being.
interesting.
Dr. Edelstein, what is it we can do for you?
For starters, you can find your way into...
that ludicrous Lucite case.
-Not you. -Look, what is this about?
We have no money on the premises. Please, if you`re from some...
little person, or rather, achondroplasiac terrorist group...
l want you to know I fully support your cause--
I'm beginning to tire of you, Dr. Bronfman.
-Lila? -Surprised, dearheart?
-This is Lila? -Yes, this is Lila. Cunt!
American and proud of it.
The hair`s gone, Nathan. All taken care of.
And I have muscles now. And I get looks every day in the street.
-You`re beautiful. -Do you want to touch me, or what?
-Yes. -Poor baby.
Thank you, Frank. You`re the best.
Anything and everything for you, my dear.
Frank and I both know what it is to be shunned...
because of our appearance.
``The attempt to force human beings to despise themselves...
is what I call hell. Andre Malraux.
Sorry, parking`s a bitch at this place.
There`s an overflow lot across the street.
Yeah, I found it.
Just over on Tilton. You can`t miss it.
Right next to the V.A. hospital.
We`d be happy to validate your stub.
Tie them up.
With pleasure.
All right, Fifi, give me your hands. Come on.
Stay.
Bad.
Get up.
Stop.
Take off your clothes.
Come on.
Off.
We`re going back to nature, you and l. I'm going to retrain you.
-I'm going to make you free again. -But I like being human now.
-l want to be the way I was before? -Good!
I'm going to show you how.
And so began my re-education, gentlemen.
Lila taught me so much. She was a stern but fair teacher.
And over time...
l began to remember the joy of living in a pure state of being.
But something else happened as well.
Something perhaps distinctly human.
Boy, you look so good from this angle.
Sorry.
You`re looking lovely this evening. Hello, my name is Puff.
I am a perfect gentleman.
Do you want to touch me, Nathan, or what?
l think something is wrong with Nathan.
l, too, think something is wrong with you, Nathan.
You have changed. You are moody. You lash out.
l feel when you make love to me...
you really make love to someone else!
He hardly looks at me during our love-making sessions.
I would never stop looking at you if you were my girl.
Mother, will you please tell Wayne to stop...
-hitting on my girlfriend? -He`s a 6-year-old boy, Nathan.
He`s hitting on her. That`s not hitting on her?
Calm down, no one`s hitting on anyone.
Maybe you could learn something from your brother...
about how to treat a woman. Do you no longer love me, or what?
Tell me now!
Just as I suspected. Get down from the tree.
Oh, please.
ls that as articulate as you can be...
after all the time I spent teaching you?
We discussed Wittgenstein, for God`s sake.
Not that you ever had anything enlightening...
to say on the subject.
Don`t worry, Lila. I'm only here for Puff.
I'm with Gabrielle now.
She`s a wonderful girl. Not some sweaty, dirty...
lusty girl.
Can I touch you, Lila? Just smell you...
how you smell now... all dirty and powerful.
Please teach me to be an ape, too. l`ll study really hard.
See, I've been practicing.
I'm not really good at it yet... but watch. I'm trying.
Put the gun down. Please, let`s be reasonable human beings here.
You and Lila stay and have your natural life. l`ll go.
You`ll never see me again. I'm not an ape.
Can I talk? l have to talk.
Hello, Nathan. Nice to see you.
Allow me to explain my position.
Before you found me...
l was a simple complete being in harmony with my world.
After you, I became duplicitous, anal, totally out of touch...
with my surroundings. ln a word, Nathan...
l became you.
Lila has reintroduced me to myself.
Hello, Lila. l love and honor you.
l think you should put the gun down.
Please! Don`t interrupt me. How very rude of you.
Words, words, words.
Words are evil!
Are they not evil, these words we use?
Does anyone know the definition of simultanagnosia?
I was intending to look it up before Lila saved me.
lt`s the inability to perceive elements as components of a whole.
Thank you! Thank you! My pleasure. Don`t mention it.
Good to see you again. Stop! Okay...
Now I'm confused. Nothing`s right.
I need to make sense. I need... I need to make...
-Puff, you`re agitated. -l talk! l! I talk! Not you! l!
I talk! I sing. I dance.
l kill you.
And then...
-l shot Nathan. -Then Lila shot Nathan.
Then Puff shot me. Then I died. That`s all I know.
That`s the end of my story.
Do I go to heaven now? Or is it hell?
Or what?
l just stay here?
l just stay here and tell it again?
Puff...
What happened to you is as much my fault as Nathan`s.
I'm going to turn myself in for the murder.
-l won`t let you do that. -Stay here in the woods.
This is a sacrifice l need to make.
Then l`ll live for both of us. l`ll be the most...
free...
-truest animal in the whole forest. -That`s what I'm counting on.
But, first, go back and testify before Congress about...
the waywardness of humankind.
Okay.
lf you think it`ll help.
And so, gentlemen, that is my story.
I agreed to testify before this committee because I hope...
to convey to the American public that there is indeed...
a paradise lost. Human beings have become so enamored...
of their intellectual prowess that they`ve forgotten to...
Look to the earth... as a teacher.
This is hubris, my friends.
And my story of destruction and betrayal is proof of that.
l will keep my promise to Lila. l will shed this suit...
and return to the wilderness.
l will live out my days naked... and free.
Thank you, sir, and God bless you.
Your story has deeply touched us all.
We will pass some legislation addressing this problem.
Thank you. That is all I ask.
Goodbye, Lila.
I take you with me in my untamed heart.
I have to say, the crowd is just eating it up.
I think that maybe he has touched us all with his message...
of respect for the natural world.
And perhaps we have all grown a little bit today.
He`s just turned west on Warren Aven-
Wait!
l saw you on C-Span.
I've been looking for you for 30 years. Then there you were.
Such a beautiful... beautiful grown man.
-Mother? -Yes, Derek.
lt`s a pleasure to meet you, Mother.
But I'm an ape like Dad was, and...
l have to go back into the woods now. Forever.
Oh, I suppose so.
l suppose that`s what I thought you were going to say.
lt`s good to see you again, though.
I'm in the book. lf you want to drop me a line or something.
I'm an ape, Mom. I'm an ape.
And apes don`t drop lines.
-Hello, my little boy. -Hey, Ma.
Did you bring any clothes? I'm freezing my ass off.
Oui. Nathan`s suit.
Sweet.
You know... I've wanted you forever.
-Say my name. -Gabrielle.
-You remind me so much of Nathan. -Like father, like son.
Plus, so much of my little mongrel doggie.
-Let`s go eat. I'm starving. -French?
Oui.